Dim Vavi's Daily Journal

Andy helped me understand one thing today - I Chose This Life.  It is one of the concepts I used regarding dating before - when I mould see happy couples white having no one, I would be fucking jealous.  Not anymore. I know why I have this life - I made it that way.  I'm not a victim here. It's applies to all life as well. Yesterday I had a dip into complete honesty and transparency.  While talking with a friend we covered personal topics that are really close to us.  I had the urge to be reactive, to hide into my shelf again and pretend I didn't mean that. To dismiss it all and bury my feelings and desires under some new story. That would have been a recipe for a disaster. It would not go anywhere. It would come over and over again. Until it blows in my face...  I did this before.  Not today though. I forced myself to stand tall, accept my emotions and then handle it. I opened up and described my thoughts pretty good.  I'm glad I did it. It is on...

It's not the right time. I made this excuse before enrolling in coaching.  I thought everything needs to be perfect, for stars to align before I will be able to do that.  All the times in my life when I thought like that, I've been proven wrong. I would say that ever the best time can turn into mediocre, or may never come, more likely. And the worst usually becomes best just from having really low expectations and showing up.  I had so much success with this coaching in just 3 weeks.  I had epiphanies in the first week. And that is what happens if we just allow it.   I believe I am very lucky. Always has been. It makes it hard to see all I do as personal actionment. Ego...  But do I need to see it like that, or do I want results?  If I found people that gave me success, that still means I made effort to connect with them.  I facilitated the opportunity It is my doing. Everything that happens is my choice - I didn't run away. I stayed and allo...